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December 30, 2010

Girls complete the job, no matter what :)


The FBI had an opening for an assassin. After all the background checks,
interviews and testing were done, there were 3 finalists; two men and a
woman.

For the final test, the FBI agents took one of the men to a large
metal door and handed him a gun. "We must know that you will follow our
instructions no matter what the circumstances. Inside the room you will
find your wife sitting in a chair . . . Kill her!!"

The man said, "You can't be serious. I could never shoot my wife." The
agent said, "Then you're not the right man for this job. Take your wife
and go home."

The second man was given the same instructions. He took the gun and went
into the room. All was quiet for about 5 minutes. The man came out with
tears in his eyes, "I tried, but I can't kill my wife." The agent said,
"You don't have what it takes. Take your wife home."

Finally, it was the woman's turn. She was given the same instructions, to
kill her husband. She took the gun and went into the room. Shots were
heard, one after another. They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the
walls. After a few minutes, all was quiet. The door opened slowly and
there stood the woman, wiping the sweat from her brow. "This gun was
loaded with false bullets" she said. "I had to beat him to death with the
chair!!"

MORAL: Girls are extremely determined..... Don't mess with them?

December 23, 2010

E&Y accused of Lehman whitewash, says a Report


New York: The New York's attorney general is accusing accounting giant Ernst & Young of helping Lehman Brothers Holdings disguise its financial condition for more than seven years, while collecting more than $150 million in fees from the firm, according to a media report.

"New York's attorney general Andrew Cuomo is accusing E&Y of helping Lehman Brothers disguise its financial condition for more than seven years, while collecting more than $150 million in fees from the firm," The Wall Street Journal reported.
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The lawsuit filed by Cumo alleges that firms engaged in practices to temporarily erase as much as $50 billion in Lehman assets. This often occurred near
the end of a quarter, allegedly making the company look much healthier than it was, the report noted.

The two companies worked together from 2001 until Lehman's 2008 collapse.

December 16, 2010

Create Rescue CD of Windows 7

Follow these steps to create a Windows 7 System Repair Disc:

Windows 7 System Repair Disc gives you access to Windows 7 System Recovery tools, a powerful set of Microsoft created diagnostic and repair utilities.
The first thing a new Windows 7 user should do is create a System Repair Disc. With a System Repair Disc, you'll have access to Windows 7 diagnostic tools like Startup Repair, System Restore, System Image Recovery, Windows Memory Diagnostic, and Command Prompt.

Important: You'll need a CD or DVD burner to create a Windows 7 System Repair Disc. A USB device is not supported bootable System Repair media.

Difficulty: Easy
Time Required: Creating a System Repair Disc in Windows 7 should only take around 5 minutes.
Here's How:
  1. Click on Start -> All Programs -> Maintenance.
  2. Click on the Create a System Repair Disc shortcut.
  3. Choose your optical disc drive from the Drive: drop-down box.
  4. Insert a blank CD or DVD in your optical drive.
    Note: An empty CD should be large enough for a System Repair Disc. I created a Windows 7 System Repair Disc on a new Windows 7 32-bit installation and it was only 145MB. If you only have a blank DVD available, that's okay too of course.
  5. Click the Create disc button.
    Windows 7 will now create the System Repair Disc on the blank disc you inserted in the previous step. No special disc burning software is required.
  6. After the System Repair Disc creation is complete, Windows 7 displays a dialog box that you can close by clicking the Close button.
  7. Click the OK button back on the original Create a system repair disc window that's now showing up on your screen.
  8. Label the CD or DVD as "Windows 7 System Repair Disc" and keep it someplace safe.
    You can now boot from this disc to access the System Recovery diagnostic tools available for the Windows 7 operating system.

December 15, 2010

Principal repayment not elegible for deduction under DTC

Where house property is purchased using loaned funds, the owner is eligible for a deduction of Rs. 1,00,000 towards repayment of the principal amount of the housing loan. This deduction is however, subject to an overall cap along with various other prescribed investments under Section 80C of the Act. It is important to note that this benefit is not envisaged under the provisions of the new Direct Tax Code that will come into effect from April 1, 2012.
   
   
The benefit of interest deductions continue to exist in the proposed new Direct Tax Code.
   
The new Direct Tax Code also provides for similar exemption in respect of long-term capital gains. 
In addition to the above, investment in a house property is also eligible for exemption from payment of capital gains subject to fulfilment of certain conditions. To avail this benefit, the taxpayer would have to invest/reinvest the capital gains for purchasing HP. Such exemption is available only if the capital gain is a long-term and arises due to transfer of any long-term capital asset.
   

December 11, 2010

AMD launched new powerfull Chips

Advanced Micro Devices (AMD) has unveiled the Made-in-India Ontario chip, the first in the Fusion family chips that is going to make small computing devices such as netbooks and tablets three times powerful than when they work on the chips made by its competitors.
Another variant of Ontario, Zacate, will power desktops and laptops, with higher horsepower to run applications. This also allows users to search for people in videos using their photos as filters.
Developed by a 86-member team in Hyderabad in two years, the new generation chip marries the power of central processing unit (CPU) and graphics processing unit (GPU), promising to change the way gamers play games and people who watch videos on computing devices. First shipments of netbooks embedded with the thumb-sized Ontario have been sent to markets by companies such as Acer, while others are on the way to change designs to suit the new chip.
Eagerly awaited by gizmo lovers and industry watchers across the globe, the chip is likely to make its presence felt in the total available market of 10 crore units a year to power a variety of digital devices.

December 10, 2010

Create online form and paste on your website

Create your online form and paste it on your website

http://www.emailmeform.com/

True Telephone Conversations from IT company helpdesk


Helpdesk: Click on the 'my computer' icon on to the left of ! the screen.
Customer: Your left or my left? 

Helpdesk: Good day. How may I help you?
Male customer: Hello... I can't print.
Helpdesk: Would you click on start for me and ...
Customer: Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me! I'm not Bill Gates damn it!

Hi good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time I try it says 'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can't find it...

Customer: I have problems printing in red...
Helpdesk: Do you have a color printer?
Customer: No.

Helpdesk: What's on your monitor now ma'am?
Customer: A tedd! y bear my boyfriend bought for me in the supermarket. 

Helpdesk: Your password is the small letter a as in apple, a capital letter V as in! Victor, the number 7.
Customer: Is that 7 in capital letters?

Helpdesk: What antivirus program do you use?
Customer: Netscape.
Helpdesk: That's not an antivirus program.
Customer: Oh, sorry...Internet Explorer.

Helpdesk: How may I help you?
Customer: I'm writing my first e-mail.
Helpdesk: OK, and, what seems to be the problem?
Customer: Well, I have the letter a,
but how do I get the circle around it?

December 7, 2010

Tarqenbein Lyrics

Inspirational Lyrics 

Hum kal ke kal niptenge jo hoga dekh lenge

Hum tas se mas na honge jo hoga dekh lenge

Thande padee jo haunsleeee sekh lenge

Chadte suraj koooo choooooo ke dekh lenge

Tension vension kya hai bas mathe k bal hote hain

Beparwah muskano se hi masle hal hote hain

Aazmaaa le aazmaaaa le changi hai tarkeebein

Tarkeebein, tarkeebein kitni hai tarkeebein

Tarkeebein, tarkeebein apni hai tarkeebein

SBI MCG to have two CGM's

State Bank of India (SBI), the country’s largest lender, is planning to reorganise its entire mid-corporate group (MCG), which currently has a loan portfolio of over Rs 150,000 crore.

As part of this effort, it will have two chief general managers (CGM) instead of one. “The proposal was cleared by the SBI board yesterday,” A P Verma, deputy managing director and group executive of MCG, told mediapersons here today.

According to Verma, the initiative has been mooted with a view to have a closer contact with customers, better coordination and faster business development.

SBI created MCG in July 2004 with an objective to extend relationship banking to mid-corporates with an annual turnover of Rs 50-500 crore. The group lends amounts ranging from Rs 10 crore to Rs 500 crore.

“By mid-January, we will appoint another CGM who will be based in Hyderabad and to whom the general managers of Chennai, Bangalore, Bhubaneswar and Kolkata will report,” he said, adding that the five regions were expected to grow faster than the other five regions of MCG.

MCG currently has 64 branches functioning under 10 regional offices headed by general managers who report to the CGM based in Mumbai. It has 6,500 clients.

Verma said MCG would expand its branch network to 200 over the next 18 months as it intended to have a presence in all the “top 100 business centres in India”. In 2010-11, the group's loan portfolio was expected to increase to Rs 175,000 crore. Its year-on-year (yoy) growth rate stood at 16-17 per cent.

Following the economic downturn in 2008-09, MCG restructured a large number of accounts. The outstanding of the restructured accounts was around Rs 15,000 crore. In the second quarter of the current financial year, the slippage amount stood close to Rs 800 crore. Of this, just three clients accounted for Rs 600 crore. “I, however, think that the worst is over with regard to non-performing assets,” he said.

Verma said credit offtake had not picked up in tune with the GDP growth rate. One of the reasons for this was rupee borrowing becoming costlier compared to external borrowing. Consequently, large corporates were changing their borrowing profiles.

Nevertheless, he envisaged further hardening of interest rates till March 2011. “We are getting into a situation where the so-called second generation reforms have to be ushered in,” he added.

Earlier, Verma inaugurated SBI's renovated Industrial Finance Branch, which was started here in 1989. It is stated to be the bank's biggest branch in the state with an yearly business of Rs 7,700 crore and a profit of Rs 148 crore.

December 2, 2010

Be carefull of following in an Interview?

1. Lying
Although it's tempting, it doesn't work. By all means gloss over the unflattering things. But out-right fibbing NEVER pays.

Mark Twain said: "If you tell the truth, you never have to remember anything." Think about it. They will catch you out later.

2.
Slating your current company or boss
Fedup with your current job and would give anything to leave becausethey've treated you badly? Your job interview is NOT the time to seekrevenge. Bear in mind that the interviewer will be listening to youranswers and thinking about what it would be like to work with you. Askyourself: do you like working with people who constantly criticiseothers? Isn't it a bit wearing? The trouble is that the interviewerdraws massive conclusions from your answers. So your throwaway commentabout your boss or employer may be interpreted to be your "standard"way of thinking. It makes you look bad, not your employer.

3. Being Rude
Ifyou find you were accidentally rude, then apologise calmly andgenuinely. Then leave it behind you and get on with the rest of theinterview. If you dwell on it, it will affect your performance. What's"rude"? Well, that depends on your audience. As a rule of thumb, avoidcracking jokes about potentially sensitive topics and beware of beingtoo "pally" with the interviewer: polite and friendly is enough. Afterall, you're not in the pub with them. So stay professional. Also bearin mind that everyone you meet could be involved in the selectionprocess. So blanking the receptionist or talking down to the juniormembers of staff could cost you the job.

4. Complaining
Ok,so your train journey might have been a nightmare and maybe you thoughtthe tube would never arrive, or the tailbacks on the motorway wereendless. But your interviewer doesn't want to know that!
Complaining,even in jest, is not a recommended icebreaker. It may be completelyharmless, or it might simply make the interviewer switch off. Don't letcomplaining set the tone for the interview!

5. Talking about people you don't get on with at work
Thesedays, it's common to be asked how you deal with conflict. Companiesrealise the importance of interpersonal relationships in the workingenvironment. So if they ask you about difficult people or situations,make sure you hold back from character assassination and blaming othersfor problems because it won't do you any favours! If you accidentallydo "break" this rule, apologise and explain what you "really" meant.

6. Not Being Prepared

Re-readthe relevant version of your CV and the job advert, just before theinterview. You'd be surprised how many people can't remember what theywrote on their CV. And if you remember what type of person the jobadvert was looking for, it's easier to demonstrate that you have thosequalities.
Makesure you've brought with you anything you were asked for. It's fine tobring a note-pad and pen, but make sure they're tidy. It's even ok tobring notes with you; particularly if you have any questions you wantto ask. It shows you're taking the job application seriously.Ill-prepared candidates rarely get job offers.

7. Appearing to be too nervous, or too confident
Ifyou appear too nervous they'll think you're not confident enough to dothe job. However, appearing too confident will make them think youwon't fit into the team. If interview nerves are an issue for you, it'sworth getting practical help from a professional, such as an interviewcoach.


8. Making a weak first impression
Unfortunately,no matter how hard the interviewer tries, a lot of "don't want to hirethem" decisions are made in the first few minutes of contact. If youmake a strong first impression, the interviewer will be more inclinedto overlook "imperfections" in your answers.

9. Not having researched the company

Asa general rule, the more famous the brand, the more they will expectyou to have done your homework. Researching the company shows you'reserious about the job.


10. Putting your foot in it and not noticing

Yes,we know, you didn't mean to put your foot in it. But it doesn't reallymatter what you intended. What counts is how the other person reacts.So what can you do? Be prepared to simply say "sorry, that's not what Imeant!" This requires you to actually be paying attention to theinterviewer, rather than your own thoughts and feelings. Once you'veapologised, leave it there, take a deep breath to help you relax andmove on with the job interview.

December 1, 2010

Micromax comes with Android based Mobile


Micromax has showcased its first Android run phone, the Andro A60 to the Indian markets. A full touch screen smartphone, the Andro A60 comes with the Android 2.1 Eclair update. The phone will start selling next month and will be available at a price of about 8,000.

Micromax is the third largest mobile phone maker in India and the latest Android phone from the company will further strengthen its hold in the Indian market. The Andro A60 has a 2.8 inch resistive screen with an auto focused 3.2 MP camera. The phone is powered by a 600MHz microprocessor.
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Weighing 105 grams, the dimensions of the phone are 106.8mm x 59.2mm x 14.0mm. The phone comes with an internal memory of 150MB and can be expanded up to 32GB using a micro SD card. Connectivity features of the phone include Wi-Fi, Bluetooth, GPS.

The Andro A60 also packs in an Accelerometer and gravity sensor for playing the Android-platform based games. The device includes FM radio and is powered by a 1280 mAh Li-ion battery. The battery gives just four hours of talktime, a worrisome feature for an Android phone.